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Writer's pictureJodi Madsen

The Cervical Cancer Chronicles: W2D5

I am not a napper. I have never been able to lie down with good (any) faith that I will wake up in a timely manner, chipper, or even in the same dimension. Rest? Nah man, sign me up for that coffee I forgot to drink when I made it that morning! I may be a changed woman! First, I used to drink coffee all day every day, but now I have learned it messes with the anti nausea prescription I have. Best not to fool around with that at this point. Though it has gotten close, I have yet to upchuck and plan to keep my clean record as such for as long as I can. Secondly, I have taken at least a two hour nap every day into this treatment so far. I contribute much of that success to my environment. I know if I were to be at home, or if we had the kids down here with us there would be no way I could shut my brain off long enough to fall asleep. My infusion obviously takes me down a few pegs, slaps me upside the head, and yells, "Slow down woman!! Shut your eyes, I've got this!" In every appointment I have had with a doctor rearing the oncologist title I found myself asking, "What can I do to make this treatment more effective? What can I eat? How much can I work out? How can I contribute to the success of this plan of action?" The bottom line is, I don't have the physical ability to do squat in the grand scheme of treating cancer. I have a difficult time handing over the reigns in any situation, let alone the only situation that directly involves me living a life not revolving around treatments and non-stop cancer banter. Every single person I have talked to has mentioned resting being a big part of healing. But resting? Not doing anything? ....If you say so, doc. I never thought doing nothing would be so difficult to cope with! I think I may be making nap guilt a thing.


Alas, I have given in to the daily naps. It may be partially because if I am asleep, I can't be nauseas. I wouldn't say that I feel like getting sick often, but it is almost as if my stomach is lined with a fuzzy feeling. Not the warm fuzzies a person would imagine that accompany that word in this sense. It is more like that of a radioactive film. One that is ready to burst if shaken or exposed to too much of a strong stench. My tongue often feels a form of fuzzy as well. This fuzzy is more of a blurred fuzz. Tastes do not feel blurred, but it is kind of like my tongue is half asleep at times. Like a tongue after a weekend of partying way too hard on the lake that has forgotten the magnificence of water, fuzzy and pretty sad. Though water is quite magnificent each time I have a drink. I do have to stay quite hydrated to avoid any unnecessary damage to my bladder and kidney. I have never been able to smash hydration goals, so this part has been a bit of a struggle for me. *Insert quick drink break here.* As far as any other side effects, fatigue is the only one. I haven't had any headaches since the first day of chemo. I expect to experience that again on Tuesday for my next infusion. The fatigue isn't terrible though, I think it is more of a drowsiness expected to be and probably brought on by the anti-nausea. I feel as though I am just less interested in doing things because we're in Omaha and away from everything and everyone I know. Once Nate convinces me to go to the gym or start one of my workouts, I am able to set a goal and accomplish them and feel good in doing so. So if you get bored, shoot me a text or give us a call. There is a high chance I'm sleeping, but a higher chance I'm just bored out of my gourd.


Every time I feel a little distressed or out of my normal state of high functioning positivity, you guys never fail to bless me with the most perfect words to snap me out of it. I appreciate every word I've been able to read from you and they keep my head lifted, so thank you so so so much! I just wanted to touch on what has been going on the past few days and what my first week of treatment looked like. Pretty uneventful, but busy in a different air. Thank you for following our little adventure!


If you got an address for us, you may want to check the zip code. Nate and I realized we have been giving out the wrong one to people. Whoops!!


Until next time!


XOJO



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